The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old.
I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my
reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that
it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.

Old Age, I've decided, is a gift.
I am now, probably for the first time in my life,
the person I have always wanted to be.

Oh, not my body ... the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the
sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person
that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don't
agonize over those things for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends,
my wonderful life, my loving family for
less gray hair or a flatter belly.

As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself,
and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.
I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making
my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need,
but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a
treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave
this world too soon; before they understood the
great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the
computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60 &70's,
and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body,
and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to,
despite the pitying glances from the jet set.
They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful.
But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten.
And I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken.
How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one,
or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet
gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us
strength and understanding and compassion.
A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and
will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have
my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs
be forever etched into deep grooves on my face.

So many have never laughed, and so many have
died before their hair could turn silver.
As you get older, it is easier to be positive.
You care less about what other people think.

I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned
the right to be wrong. So, to answer your question,
I like being old — it has set me free.

I like the person I have become.
I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here,
I will not waste time lamenting what could have been,
or worrying about what will be.

And I shall eat dessert every single day
(if I feel like it).

(Contributed by Gabrielle who lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico)

 

CHOICES & CHANGES
Choices & Changes is offered as a guide on how to plan to get the most from life's second half-not how to plan to get the most from "retirement." While you may think this is splitting hairs, you will come to realize how the words we use impact our perceptions, our self-image and ultimately our reality when planning for and experiencing the future. Ambrosius' book is one of the few that offers the reader a solution to life planning if he or she is willing to invest the time. The book is short and very easy to read. Ambrosius clearly demonstrates the power and negative connotation contained in the lexicon of words used in our culture to describe the later stage of life. The reader is asked to consider the impact these words will have on his or her own future. So often books that deal with aging issues are purely academically driven, but Ambrosius draws upon his experience and challenges the reader to think about those topics which will have the most impact on lengthening one's life expectancy. He encourages the reader to make positive adjustments to their life path. In Choices and Changes, Ambrosius provides a compact yet insight-rich guide for anyone genuinely ready to get the most out of life in the later years.
By G. Richard Ambrosius

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