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Know & Grow Monthly Magazine
"When you judge another,
you do not define them, you define yourself."

~ Wayne Dyer... Get Inspired Here Every Day

June 26, 2006


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THIS WEEK'S ISSUE


From the Inside Out...
Dunk Not!


Yes You Can!...
Have the Courage
to Heal


Far Horizons...
Icy Krasnoyarsk


Untangling the Web
...

What a Site and
Computer Ease


Just for YOU...
Special Treats


Laughing It Off...
All I Need to
Know about Life...


Fascinating Facts...
Burning the Midnight Oil


Joyful Lifestyles...
The See-Saw Effect

 


Inspiration Online Magazine

It's Time to BE — the World
You Want to See
!

It took me years and years to give myself a break and realize that I did NOT need to be perfect ... even though my mother seemed to think so. Once I could then breathe 'freely' personally, it became easy to forgive and forget missteps in others.

~ Chelle Thompson, Editor


From the Inside OutDunk Not - Inspiration Line
DUNK NOT!

It was a slam dunk. At least, it should have been!

Everyone in the arena knew it as the tall, graceful athlete glided toward the basket. There was no one within 20 feet of him, no obstacle to prevent him from scoring as he had so many times before.

The only question was: what kind of dunk would it be? A thundering, two-handed power dunk, complete with the obligatory chin-up on the rim? Or a more aesthetically pleasing one-handed dunk, perhaps with a little windmill action, or some over-the-shoulder bravado?

In any case, it was going to be two points for My Team at a critical juncture of a close, competitive NBA playoff game. And that was really all that mattered.

Mentally, I added two points to our score as I watched the player — My Player — move into position for a shot that 99 percent of NBA players would slam home 99 percent of the time.

And then the unimaginable happened. He missed.

Torn between dunking and simply laying the ball in the basket, My Player clanged the ball off the rim. I couldn't believe it. Never mind that he was running at full speed during a pressure-packed game, with thousands of opposing fans screaming at him to miss. As far as I was concerned there was no excuse for missing such an easy, automatic shot.

"How do you miss that shot?" I moaned to my sons, who were watching the game with me. "A professional does NOT miss that shot, not in a game like this!"

For the rest of the game, I was all over My Player. I groaned at every missed shot, every blown defensive assignment, every bad pass. There's no question that he didn't play a perfect game. In fact, he played poorly — especially after the missed dunk.

But in my mind, every mistake was magnified by the memory of the ball clanging off the rim. By the end of the game, I was prepared to blame the three-point loss on the slam dunk that should have been.

"You're a pro," I scolded him through the television screen as he walked to the locker room, his head bowed in defeat. "A pro doesn't make mistakes like that!"

Later that evening I was doing some filing when I paused to re-read a column from several weeks earlier. I winced when I came upon a typo — at least, I'm pretty sure it was a typo. Did someone slip the word "tje" into the English vocabulary when I wasn't looking?

I didn't think so.

So I messed up. Instead of "the" I had written "tje." But it was an understandable error. After all, the letters "h" and "j" are right next to each other on the keyboard. Anyone could slip and hit the wrong key.

And as for missing the error in the editing process ... well, I had been in a great hurry that week. Besides, anyone reading the column would know that I meant to write "the," not "tje." And I was sure the editors to whom I send the column — outstanding professionals one and all — would catch the mistake and fix it before it went into publication.

I had just about rationalized the mistake into oblivion when a local sportscaster began showing highlights from the game during the nightly news. Sure enough, the first clip he showed was My Player missing that easy basket.

My stomach started churning all over again until I glanced down at the column in my hands. My eyes went directly to "tje." And somewhere in the back of my mind I heard a familiar, scolding voice: "You're a pro. A pro doesn't make mistakes like that!" Especially not on "the," which should have been ... you know ... a slam dunk.

I guess it's true — we don't really have a right to expect perfection in others until we're prepared to expect it in ourselves. And not just professionally. This also holds true on the highway, in the grocery store, at the movies and most especially in the home. Unless we can offer ourselves as a perfect example, we ought to be willing to cut each other a lot of slack.

In other words, judge not ... even if you dunk not ...

~By Joseph Walker,
Veteran journalist, columnist,
critic and author of the book:
...Home Remedies for an Ailing World


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Ye
s You Can!

HAVE THE COURAGE TO HEAL

Does the concept of courage and healing seem at all intriguing? It does to me.

As a physician, a gastroenterologist with over 25 years clinical experience of caring for patients I have pondered the difference between how I was trained to practice my profession and my present understanding of healing. As a product of the traditional approach to medicine, I viewed the patient as a machine who was suffering from some undisclosed mechanical failure. Why else would they be sitting before me in my office? Certainly I was aware that anxiety or depression could exacerbate the symptoms of disease, but the extent to which the mind, body and spirit were united was unappreciated.

Gradually, as my own understanding evolved, it became crystal clear that all three elements co-existed, interacted and inter-related in a dynamic flow. Since the term ‘healing’ referred to ‘making whole’, all aspects of the patient needed to be understood and addressed if true healing was to be accomplished.

SELF-AWARENESS PRECEDES SELF-REPAIR

I also came to appreciate, to a far greater degree than I could have imagined, that my role as physician was to facilitate the body’s intrinsic and phenomenal ability to heal itself.

Gradually, I began educating my patients to this truth. As products of our culture’s mechanistic paradigm of disease, they would enter my examining room as if they were bringing their car to a mechanic. Whether expressed explicitly or not, the attitude was, ‘fix me, you’re the doctor’. I had to help transform that attitude and challenge them to participate in their own healing.

For some it became a rather frightening concept to ponder. It meant taking charge of their own mental/emotional/ spiritual state of being. It meant facing their own demons. It required the courage to see that their symptoms might be the tip of a deeper iceberg of discontent and disequilibrium; that their symptoms might very well reflect a deeper dis-ease of mind and spirit; that they would have to listen to what their body was telling them and come to terms with feelings and thoughts that had been previously denied or even repressed.

THE COURAGE TO BE — HEALED

Before you can understand the nature of healing you must understand the spiritual nature of human beings. While for some patients this will have to do with faith, religion and a belief in God, for others it may simply be a sense of connection to the ‘Universe’ or to ‘Spirit.’

The universal human attraction to religion and spirituality can not be debated here, yet it also cannot be ignored in any discussion of healing. There are great insights to be found in all the world’s traditions, as well as many schools of metaphysics. Oftentimes, it is the search for relief from illness or imbalance that leads people to find their true spiritual path.

Protestant theologian Paul Tillich had written about courage all of us need in the face of life’s enormous existential challenges. Fear is the primal human state of being. We face it as children as we confront the cold reality that we are unique, vulnerable and sensitive beings.

Henceforth, our lives seem to require a constant struggle against the ‘slings and arrows of outrageous fortune’. We become reactive to real and perceived threats from others. We fear intimacy and the expression of love for this exposes our inner fragility. For many this becomes an attitude that ranges from sadness and depression to hostility and outrage.

Such feelings form the substrate for disease itself. Healing often requires the courage to face that perception and the courage to choose to transform that feeling/attitude/belief into a mechanism for growth and equanimity. How we cope with these ever-present challenges helps determine the quality of our lives.

There are powerful strategies which can unquestionably help us in our own internal struggles. We need to learn, and really ‘get,’ that our minds do create our own realities and that courage is needed to face the challenge, to own up to that truth. It is not easy, but ultimately it is the only path to internal peace and, yes, healing.

~© Steven E. Hodes, MD., is a board certified gastroenterologist with over 25 years private practice based in New Jersey. He also has a degree in Religious Studies and teaches Contemporary Metaphysics at Brookdale College, as well as lecturing and writing on Kabbalah and Healing, the Jewish View of Afterlife and on Near-Death Experience. Visit him at his daily Blog, Physician to Meta-Physician at www.Meta-MD.com

 


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Far Horizons

ICY KRASNOYARSK

Krasnoyarsk, Siberia
Photo by: AP/Torsten Blackwood
Learn More Here

Fishermen stand on the icy bank of Yenisei river in Krasnoyarsk, the third largest city in Siberia, founded as a fort in July 1628 and the center of the Siberian Cossack movement in the 19th century. Krasnoyarsk, rich in culture and natural beauty, was not accessible to tourists and visitors until the late 1980's, as it was hidden from main tourists routes. A bridge near Krasnoyarsk carries the Trans-Siberian Railway across the Yenisei. It was built between 1893 and 1896, and was honored in the Paris Exhibition at the same time as the Eiffel Tower. The World Heritage List in 2003 described it as "an early representation of a typical parabolic polygonal truss bridge in Russia" which became "a testing ground for the application of engineering theories and the development of new innovative solutions worldwide." The right bank of Yenisei is notable for the National Nature Reserve Stolby (Pillars in Russian) which covers an area of 470 km² (181 mile²) with numerous giant granite rock formations, many of extraordinary shapes.

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Untangling the Web

Inspiration Online Magazine
WHAT A SITE!

"Thomas E. Morin Master Sculptor"
For 50 years Tom Morin's interest in sculptural composition has been greatly influenced by the physical structures of Renaissance frames, oriental scrolls and architectural forms that are universal to all cultures. During the last 20 years he has been working with plastic-backed sanding belts and discs which he veneers onto a wood armature. The color is achieved by retaining the natural embedded material that has been sanded: exotic wood, pewter, aluminum, etc. Most of the works are reliefs and reflect the colors and meditative quality of the high mesa desert.
www.ArtistsStudio.com

 

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Inspiration Online Magazine
COMPUTER-EASE

"eMail Link's Are Not Live"
First, your popup stopper could be interfering with the links you are trying to open. If this is the case, you can hit the Ctrl button and click on the link again. Ctrl + a click allows the link to open. Second, if you use Internet Explorer, you have to make sure it is set as your default browser. To check this, open IE and go to Tools, Internet Options. Click on the Programs tab and make sure the box at the bottom that says "Internet Explorer should check to see whether it is the default browser" is checked. This will allow IE to open any links that you click on.

If those two things still don't fix the link problem, check that your folder options are set to your specific browser. Go to Start, Control Panel and make sure it is in the classic view. Once there, click on the Folder Options icon and choose the File Types tab. Highlight "(NONE) URL: HyperText Transfer Protocol" and click on the Advanced button, then the Edit button. In the the Application line make sure it says IExplore and so on (for whichever browser you use). If you've recently switched browsers, you may still have your old settings in there and that could be causing the problem with the links.


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Just for YOU
SPECIAL TREATS

AN INSPIRATIONAL GUIDE
FOR THE RECOVERING SOUL

While written specifically to help those in all areas of recovery, "An Inspirational Guide for the Recovering Soul" offers inspiration and guidance to everyone on a spiritual path. Whether we, or someone we love, are dealing with substance addiction, childhood abuse or trauma, posttraumatic stress or even the effects of disturbing world affairs, the vast majority of us are involved in some form of soul recovery. Author Barbara Sinor, Ph.D., has written this book for us.

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Laughing It Off I learned from a cow ...
ALL I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT LIFE ...

I Learned From a Cow:

Don't just be one of the herd.
Wake up in a happy mooo-d.
Some days can be udder frustration.
Munch hay while the sun shines.
Live for-heifer young.
Party 'till the cows come home.
Don't cry over spilled milk.
The cream always rises to the top.
Don't stoop to a barnyard mentality.
Turn the udder cheek and mooo-ve on.
Don't be bossy.

If it's good, milk it for all its worth!
If you need to get somewhere, hoof it.

Successful people are the moo-vers and shakers.
Don't take any bull from anybody.
Following your heart will always steer you in the right direction.
He who lives with the herd learns to watch his step.
Sometimes it's better to be seen and not herd.
And ...
Don't forget to cow-nt your blessings every day
!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

~Contributed by Jane at The-Cats-Meow.com
.Humor Archives Here ARCHIVES

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BURNING THE MIDNIGHT OIL




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Joyful Lifestyles: Weekly InsightsInspiration Online Magazine - Joy
THE SEE-SAW EFFECT

Contrary to the old adage, Silence ISN’T always golden. It can often be a lethal weapon! I used to think that if I held in my anger, no one would know, and I’d be the lovable diplomat. Well, people couldn’t hear it, but they sure could feel it ... which was even more destructive because the anger energy came out of nowhere without being defined. Internalizing my anger also made ME miserable, and would have eventually caused physical illness had I not realized what was happening and changed my behavior pattern. Let’s take an expanded look at what happens when we push our feelings down inside of ourselves and don’t express the complete truth.

There is a frequent phenomenon in relationships called the “Seesaw Effect”. This happens when whatever anger, fear, worry, anxiety, etc. that we are suppressing transfers over, and is expressed by another person. I have coined the term “Energetically Audible” to describe how our unspoken feelings are actually quite perceptible by others. Our emotional tension affects everyone we’re in relationship with — whether it’s a romantic partner, family member, child, business partner, whomever. What we do with our emotions on a daily basis — pushing them down or talking about them or hiding them — defines the quality of our life. Like a storage tank, we are all containers of emotional energy which can either rise up in the container or stay very low. In her incredible audio/video tape program “Making Love Work,” Dr. Barbara DeAngelis (author of Real Moments: Discover the Secret for True Happiness ) calls this energy transfer "TANKING" and illustrates the process in the diagram below:

See-Saw Effect

As you can see, a family is actually an interconnected system of energy containers. All of the fear, anger, sadness, worries, unhappiness, etc. that the parents suppress is tanked over to the children who express it by acting out, bed-wetting, shyness, drug and alcohol abuse, etc. “Addictions are rampant in the world because they temporarily let us become numb so we don’t feel how much stuff is in our tank,” explains Dr. DeAngelis. “Through awareness and action we can change our programming and break the family chain of tanking.” The little pipe connecting these containers represents the RELATIONSHIP. When we are in relationship with someone we can feel their energy. We know when they’re upset, even if they’re not talking about it, and we know when they’re happy and can tell when their moods change. This pipe effect allows us to feel what someone close to us feels.

Suppose a husband and wife (call them Fred and Ethel) are talking about the upcoming holiday weekend. Ethel says, “I was thinking about the two of us going away without the kids for a romantic getaway this weekend.” Fred replies, “Oh honey, I forgot to tell you my old college roommate, Rickie, is coming to town and we thought it’d be cool to go fishing for three days.” Ethel feels the anger bubbling inside her, but, it’s NOT NICE to be angry, so she shoves the anger down saying, “Oh, it’s no big deal!” Her suppressed anger energy then pushes through the pipe (see diagram) and Fred, all of a sudden, starts feeling annoyed.

Ethel continues, “The fishing is fine, I understand.” Fred says, “It doesn’t sound like you understand, you sound annoyed.” As he gets upset, she pushes her anger down more, saying, “It’s okay, I’m not upset, you don’t have to raise your voice.” He yells, “You’re always telling me what to do!” As he gets more angry, she gets even calmer and says, “Honey, I didn’t do anything ... why are you yelling at me?” As she shoves it down further, Fred blows up and leaves the room. Ethel looks shocked and says — “What at temper! We were just having a nice little talk. What’s HIS problem?” This is tanking in action ... emotions we suppress, deny, won’t feel or pretend we aren’t having, will be expressed by our partner and vice versa. In the example of Fred and Ethel, who looks like the nice one in the relationship and who looks like the hot head? Ethel is SO sweet and even tempered and that Fred gets sooooooo volatile and mad at things!

If our partner (or child, close friend, work associate, etc.) is someone who pushes down everything, we need to be prepared to feel like we’re out of control with all kinds of emotions flying through us. If we should decide to leave that relationship, we’d probably find ourselves feeling surprisingly calm and peaceful. That is until we pick up the phone and call them, or meet them for coffee. Then our pipe reconnects and the tanking starts again.

If BOTH containers push down their emotional energy, the pipe bursts with the pressure. This is the main reason we lose that feeling of connection, sense of intimacy and the chemistry in our relationships. The solution is for us to clean out our tanks ... to free ourselves of emotional tension. One way to do this is by understanding and clearing our emotional baggage from childhood or otherwise. Secondly, each tank has a release valve ... it’s called a MOUTH. When you feel the emotional tension building up, express it and put words to your feelings. Open the valve to let the energy out. (A word of caution, however, don’t use this as artillery by blaming your partner for your feelings or saying, “I’m feeling sort of angry, what’s bothering YOU?” )

Steve Goodier of www.LifeSupportSystem.com adds: "The most effective way of dealing with anger is to express it in words. Talk it out with the person with whom you are upset. As William Blake wrote: I was angry with my friend, I told my wrath, my wrath did end. I was angry with my foe. I told it not, my wrath did grow. Anger must be "told" to be stilled. And if it is not possible to talk directly with the offending person, find a good listener. Sometimes, just getting it out is enough. Further, talk it out soon, since unacknowledged anger is a malignant tumor. Don't let the sun set on your anger, but rather strive to finally let go of each day's resentment in order to keep a clean slate.

We are each responsible for how we CHOOSE
to perceive life, and, hence, respond to it ...


Chelle (Pronounced 'Shay') Thompson
Chelle
.
Inspiration Line's Editor


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